Hashtags: #DadQuotes

-I thought I’d
share some of my favorite dad quotes from you guys. This one’s from @mirandavillay. She’s says, “One time,
my dad asked us how he can post something for
sale on Doug’s Corner. He meant Craigslist.” “Put the bike up on
Doug’s Corner.” What’s Doug’s Corner?
-I can dig it. -This one’s from DoeDecathlon. He says, “After a meal
at a restaurant, if we had leftovers, when
the waitress came over and said, ‘Do you want a box for that?’, My dad would be like, ‘No, but
I’ll arm-wrestle you for it.'” -That’s great.
-That’s a good one, dad. -That’s great.
-That’s a good one. -I’m gonna use that.
-I know. This one’s from @Heatherrou. She says, “When my dad got
his first smartphone, ‘Hey, Heather,
when does the App Store open?'” This one’s from @sweatybetty. She says, “My dad once told me,
‘Your mother is a nice lady, but every once in a while, Satan takes a little vacation
in her body.'” [ Laughter ] -“Every once in a while.” -“Satan takes a
little vacation in her body.” -Yeah. This one’s from @Alexandra22. She says,
“This morning, my dad forgot the name for everything bagels
and asked me if I wanted
an all-inclusive bagel.” [ Laughter ] [ Cheers and applause ] -Yeah.
♪♪ -“Give me one of those all–”
-Yeah. -“I’ll take two of those
all-inclusive bagels.” -“My money’s on fire.” -This one’s from @tristansweat. She says, “My dad once said, ‘It’s better to belch
and bear the shame than to squelch the belch
and bear the pain.'” -Nice. -Fantastic. That sounds like
a lower-back tattoo. -Yeah. -This last one’s from
@suburgatorym. She says, “When my now-husband
asked my dad for permission to marry me,
and my dad said, ‘Maybe give it a couple years
and see if you still like her.'” There you have it. Those are
“Tonight Show Hashtags.” Happy Father’s Day. To check out more of
our favorites, go to tonightshow.com/hashtags.


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